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Family law

Separating from your partner... and now?

Family law

Divorce your partner… And now?
The word is out: you’re getting a divorce. An emotional rollercoaster follows, a period in which you have to make many difficult decisions. And although your head isn’t set on it at all, it’s very important to arrange everything right now. But where should you start when so much is coming at you? Our team at TLC Lawyers specializes in family law and is happy to help you. Together we will list the cases and assist you with advice and, if necessary, as a lawyer in court.


Divorce and finances
Divorce has not only emotional, but also financial consequences. With this practical checklist you can be sure that you will not forget to arrange anything in this area.

Check 1: see what you have already agreed on paper

Have agreements been made? What is on paper? Check what has been agreed and what has been legally arranged after your divorce, so that you will not be faced with any surprises.

Check 2: divide your stuff according to value

Everything you own must – unless otherwise agreed – be divided fairly after your divorce. This does not only concern your home and its contents, but also the value of your insurances, investments and possible debts.

Check 3: own house? Arrange the mortgage

Do you own your house? Then decide what you are going to do with the house. Do you want to sell? Or does one want to buy out the other? This decision has consequences for the mortgage.

Check 4: make arrangements about your children

Have agreements been made? What is on paper? Check what has been agreed and what has been legally arranged after your divorce, so that you will not be faced with any surprises.

Check 5: inform your pension funds, institutions or insurers

Your divorce has consequences for your pensions. Therefore, first of all, inform the pension funds, institutions or insurers about your divorce. Then discuss with your ex-partner how your pensions will be divided after the divorce.

What does divorce mean for your children?

Step 1: Tell the children

A divorce releases many emotions. Not only with you and your ex-partner, but also with your children. That is why it is important that you bring the news in a good way and that you communicate about it clearly and openly.


Furthermore, you can follow these ten tips:


  1. Don’t wait too long with telling. Children also need time to process a divorce.
  2. Tell the children together with your ex-partner.
  3. Choose a familiar and familiar environment.
  4. Adapt your language to the age of the children. Young children have a short concentration curve, while older children want you to take them seriously and answer all their questions.
  5. Both take the floor and alternate.
  6. Explain briefly what changes will take place.
  7. Emphasize that it is not the children’s fault.
  8. Do not talk negatively to the children about your ex-partner.
  9. Ask for their reaction.
  10. Be open to questions from the children and answer them calmly.

Step 2: consider engaging a child advocate

The child advocate is there for every child in a divorce situation as advocate and confidant. The voice of each child deserves a place within the whole. The child advocate ensures that the experience of each child becomes clear, puts it in perspective together with the child, does observation, gives explanations and translates the voice of the child to parents/carers and where necessary through a report with advice to the legal playing field.

Step 3: Regulate the parental authority

For children born before or during your marriage, both you and your ex-partner retain parental authority. If you do not want joint parental authority, you can ask the judge to assign the authority to one parent. The other way around is also possible: if the judge does not consider it in the interest of your children to assign the parental authority to both of you, he or she can judge that only one of you will get the authority. Incidentally, children from the age of twelve may indicate to the judge who they would rather live with. The agreements that are made will be laid down in the parental plan that has to be signed by you and your ex-partner.

Step 4: Think about the care distribution or contact arrangement

In case of a division of parental authority, you and your ex-partner have to make agreements about the division of the care and upbringing tasks. This is also called the care arrangement. Where do the children live on which days? Who pays what? And how do you arrange it during the vacations? These agreements are included in the parenting plan. If the parental authority is assigned to one of the parents, the other parent is entitled to a visitation arrangement. Also agreements about a possible visitation arrangement will be included in the parenting plan.

Step 5: draw up a parenting plan

If minor children are involved, you and your ex-partner are obliged to draw up a parenting plan after your divorce. This plan includes agreements about the upbringing and care of your children. On the website of the Rijksoverheid you will find more information about what a parenting plan has to comply with.

Step 6: make agreements about child support

Until your children are twenty-one years old, child support has to be paid. Until the eighteenth birthday, child support is meant as a contribution to the costs of education and care. After the eighteenth birthday, the child support serves as a contribution for study and maintenance. From the eighteenth year onwards, child support is transferred to the child itself. The amount depends on several factors, including the current standard of living and the ability of both parents.

Step 7: divide the child benefit if necessary

Do you and your ex-partner have children between zero and eighteen years old? Then you will receive child benefit. After your divorce, the child benefit is paid to the parent where your children live. In case of a division of parental authority or in case of co-parenting (the child lives 50/50 with both you and your ex-partner), you can choose to divide the child benefit. This will then be included in the parenting plan

Because a divorce involves so many emotions, it is important that clear agreements are made. TLC Lawyers will be happy to help you get your affairs straight!


Family law is not only concerned with divorce, but with all aspects of life. Think of a birth or marriage. TLC Lawyers can provide you with legal support in all aspects of family law such as;


  • Marriage
  • Living together
  • Divorce
  • Birth
  • Adoption
  • Alimony
  • Procedure
  • Parenting plan
  • Authority

Do you have to deal with family law and need legal advice?

TLC Lawyers can help you!